Between Rage & Regret: An Enemies-to-Lovers Romance (Rosavale Book 3) Read online

  Copyright © 2021 Willa Watkins

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  This book contains material protected under International and Federal Copyright Laws and Treaties. Any unauthorized reprint or use of this material is prohibited. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording or by any information storage and retrieval system without express written permission from the author/publisher.

  This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidents are the product of the author’s imagination or used fictitiously. Any resembles to actual persons, living or dead, business establishments, events or locales is entirely coincidental or has been used in a fictional manner.

  Published: Willa Watkins 2021 ([email protected])

  Cover Design: Teased By Antonette

  Proofreading: Sisters Get Lit.erary

  Also by the Author

  The Rosavale Series (Kindle Unlimited)

  Between Dusk & Dawn

  Between Truth & Lies

  Between Rage & Regret

  Between Love & Lust

  Note from the Author

  Thank you so much for giving my story a try, and I hope you love it.

  Before you start, there are a few things I’d like you to know. Although this is a standalone in a series, there is a sub-plot that is carried out throughout the entire series (4 books).

  The main plot in this book will have a resolution, but there are some aspects which will be carried throughout the series with answers being provided as the series progresses. However, each book will focus on a different couple with a happy ending for each of them.

  Once again, thank you for reading.

  Much Love,

  Willa

  Prologue

  Senior Prom - Fifteen Years Ago

  Shayleigh

  The winter wonderland-themed party had everyone twirling with shared broad smiles. The air was so thick with flashing lights and the roar of the crowd and music that thrummed straight through the bodies surrounding me and into my eardrums. The bass shook the open windows that didn’t offer enough of the outside breeze. Sweat flicked up into the air and I eyed the drink table, running my tongue over my dry lips. I wanted a glass of lemonade and my feet were sore from standing in this corner for three hours straight.

  Making myself invisible was my expertise. It was how I protected myself. But I was so thirsty. Glancing to my right then left, I took the first step away from the shadows of the cardboard cutout of Mount Everest.

  When I got to the table, I had a glass of punch instead because it was closer. I drank another and then pivoted to return to my hiding place. But I didn’t reach my safe haven. A group of my classmates ganged up on me and hopped in circles around me making pig noises.

  I knew I shouldn’t have come, but my parents forced me to come. They said I would regret not going to prom and making lifelong memories. The only thing I regretted was being here.

  I moved around like an uncoordinated dancer to try and escape the bubble. When I noticed that they wouldn’t make room for me to pass, I searched for the thinnest looking girl in the group and stomped past her. I think she fell but I didn’t look back to check.

  I didn’t have a phone to call my parents and it was too dark to walk home. Rosavale wasn’t considered dangerous but with the slums growing on the outskirts of the town, some of that sense of security was taken away. Which meant I had another two hours before my dad would come to pick me up.

  My sneakers squeaked as I rushed down the dark floors of the hallways, searching for another hiding place. I attempted to open all the doors I came across and they were all locked.

  Frustrated, my shoulders sagged and I returned to the direction I’d come from. On my way, a girl laughed and pointed at my dress. I thought it was nice. Mom sewed it herself. It was blue with layers of ruffles. However, on second thought, it did nothing but add another hundred pounds to my existing ones.

  With my head down, I pushed my glasses up the bridge of my nose and took a turn in the direction of the boy’s locker room. The boys were less cruel than the girls. And I had almost made it there when I ran into Kate Hollander and her clique. She was slim and flawless. Everything I wanted to be and all the boys liked her. She had striking features like a model from a magazine but she was also the meanest person I’d ever met.

  “Shayleigh,” Kate said and she and her friends blocked my path. “Isn’t that a pretty dress?” The sarcasm dripping from her words alone was enough for tears to start building in my eyes. “Sometimes, I wonder if you’ll burst if I poke you hard enough.”

  “Leave me alone,” I mumbled, unable to look any of them in the eyes.

  “We should try,” Kate insisted. “If you do burst, I’ll be doing you a favor.”

  One of her friends pushed me and I lost my balance but didn’t fall. Before I could regain my footing, another shove came and I crashed onto the floor with a thud. Then Kate stepped on me, digging her heels into my back. I screamed with the pain and couldn’t hold back my tears.

  “Look at that, she didn’t explode.”

  Chortling, they sashayed to the gym where the party was. I remained on the floor like the wimp I was. All I had to do was endure a couple more weeks of this and I’d leave this town and never come back. Remembering this gave me the strength to stand and run to the locker room.

  I took off my shoes and rotated my sore ankles then sat on a bench, pulled my legs up, and toyed with the ruffles on the dress. I could hear a bit of the music and occasionally some laughter and hooting.

  Sniffling, I adjusted my glasses and thought of him even though I didn’t want to. I could almost hear his gruffy voice and see his wide smile. His walk had a slight swagger to it and he liked to put his arm around whoever was next to him.

  “Kai Ashford,” I whispered underneath my breath.

  It was silly for me to daydream about him and hope to one day be the target of his attention. Even so, I admired him from afar and created thousands of fantasies in my mind. In all of them, he was in love with me.

  But Kai was out of my league. He was an Ashford and popular. He was always surrounded by groupies and had a different girl hanging on his arm every week. I wasn’t popular or pretty like the girls he hung around with. I was the nerdy girl who did his homework whenever he asked me to. I was the girl he poked at during quizzes and tests to get answers from.

  He barely noticed me but I saw and I felt like I knew him better than all his friends. Kai was more than the act he put on.

  Most of the time he was sad and I often wondered why. Once, I saw him alone in the school courtyard with tears in his eyes. I wanted to comfort him but walked away instead. And he always clutched his left ribs after gym class like he was in pain.

  The locker room door opened, taking me away from my thoughts and I recoiled. Kai staggered in and I stopped breathing. I blinked a few times to make sure I wasn’t imagining things.

  But it was him. So handsome and perfect.

  Disheveled as always, his charcoal suit was tousled, the white shirt untucked, and the silver tie was loose around his neck.

  Kai squinted at me. “What are you doing here?”

  “Nothing,” I mumbled, bringing my legs up to my chest and hugged them.

  He glanced around as if making sure no one else was there, then sat next to me. “You’re Shayleigh, right?”

  I was surprised that he remembered my name. “Yes.” He scooted a bit closer and I moved back, pressing against the col
d wall.

  “You don’t have to be afraid. I’m just hiding from Mrs. Ponds. Someone spray painted a dick on her car and she thinks it’s me. Whoever did it is a genius though, the woman is a dick.”

  I chuckled. “She is.”

  “Why are you here?”

  “Nothing. I like it here.”

  “You like being inside the boy’s stinky locker room?”

  I shrugged and didn’t answer.

  He frowned his lips and by the pity in his gaze, he must have understood why I was hiding. Kai had never made fun of me or said anything bad to me. But he never stopped his friends from ridiculing me either.

  “I like you, Shay. You keep to yourself, you’re smart, and never get into any trouble. Sometimes I wish I was more like you. Your parents must be proud of you.”

  Kai Ashford complimented me? “I-I guess. They are.”

  He touched my ankle; his hands were warm and the heat seemed to travel up my body. “Why do you stare at me all the time?”

  “I-I…” I cleared my throat. “I don’t.”

  “You know you do.” Smirking, he cocked his head to the side. “Is it because you like me?”

  I wanted to say no but was paralyzed by the glow in his brown eyes that were akin to polished amber in the first rays of dawn.

  “I think we should be friends.” His hands slowly glided upward and stopped at my knees.

  I squirmed. “Okay.”

  “I also think that you stare at me because you want me to kiss you.”

  He sat up on his knees and hovered over me. Our faces were so close that I felt the air rushing out of his nose on my skin. My gaze was steady on his. I knew the traces of his face by heart, but it was different looking at him this closely. Blood stirred in my veins as foreign sensations ran through my body.

  “Do you want to touch me, Shay?”

  My lips trembled and he pried my hand free from my legs and placed it on his face.

  What is happening? My hand quivered while I outlined the firm line of his jaw, the willful shape of his chin and sharp nose, watching as his long lashes shadowed his eyes.

  I always imagined what he would smell like and I never got close enough to find out. Now I knew. He smelled of cigarettes and alcohol entwined with warm cinnamon.

  Engraving Kai’s features even more in my mind, my hand touched his chest. Quickly he removed my hand and I thought I’d done something wrong.

  “Your hands are soft.” He nibbled on the inside of my palm. Gently he set my hand down at my side. Next, his mouth was over mine and instinctively my eyes shut. I had never kissed anyone and I didn’t know what to do.

  “It’s okay,” he murmured against my lips. “Just relax and follow my lead.”

  I did and soon my lips were moving too. I didn’t know how it happened but I ended up on my back with Kai on top of me. His hands were everywhere, groping places that had never been touched before.

  At that point, I was sure it was a dream. It was the only plausible explanation.

  I moaned when his tongue slipped between my lips and clung to him, imagining that it was just the two of us in the world. I shut down my brain and submerged into the moment. Caressing him with a voracious hunger that had been building up for years. I hugged him so tightly that his torso crushed mine and I gave myself without any caution or reservation.

  He found a way to draw my dress down to my waist and growled hoarsely against my mouth as he palmed my breasts. And I felt him hard against my thighs. I pushed myself into him and whimpered when he slipped his hand inside my panties.

  “Oh, my God,” I breathed and jolted when he touched me there. My glasses fell off and everything was blurry. But I didn’t need to see, I just wanted to feel.

  He tore off my underwear and his fingers stroked between my luscious folds, making me cry out with broken pleas.

  The strokes stopped and I was left panting when I heard the clink of his belt. He took my hand and led it to his erection. “Touch me, Shay.”

  I swallowed hard and fastened my fingers around him. With his hand over mine, instructing me, I slid along his length. “Do you want this inside of you?”

  I nodded.

  “Do you want it, Shay?”

  “Yes.”

  He grasped my wrist and removed my hand from his cock. And then pushed hard inside me in a firm and rough thrust. I screamed and dug my nails into the material covering his arms. Tears welled up in my eyes, but he didn’t stop and I didn’t ask him to. He thrust again and again. It was painful and delightful; unlike anything I had ever experienced before.

  “Do you like it like that, Shay?” he grunted. “My dick all buried inside you?”

  I gasped and shuddered with pleasure mixed with a twinge of pain and with a tension that grew and swelled inside me.

  Kai paused for a moment, still inside me, his eyes were on mine as if he felt the emotion that whirled and exploded between us. “You’re beautiful.” He spread kisses on my face and lips.

  When he moved again, it was slower and gentler. It felt so good and there I discovered what pleasure was. I shut my eyes and took a deep, languid breath.

  He kissed me lightly and murmured, “That was incredible.”

  He withdrew from inside of me and sat on the bench and helped me up. My back ached but it was nothing compared to what I had just experienced. He handed me my glasses and a sudden shyness overtook me, and in haste, I began adjusting my dress.

  He bent to pull up his pants but paused and knitted his brows. “What the hell is this?” He snapped his head up to look at me. “You were a virgin?”

  I crossed my hands over my chest and my ears felt like they were on fire. I blushed deeply and sought his gaze. “It’s fine, Kai.”

  “No, it’s not. You should have told me. Fuck, you should have stopped me. You didn’t deserve this.”

  “Kai, stop.” I touched his hand. “It’s okay. I don’t regret it.”

  “It still doesn’t make it okay.” He shook his head. “I’m sorry.”

  He hauled up his pants and rounded a corner into the showers and returned with his pants on and a towel in his hands. “Here, you should clean up.”

  “Thanks.” I took the towel and hid inside one of the showers to finish adjusting my dress. I used the towel and didn’t know what to do with it so I folded it and kept it with me.

  When I returned, Kai was messing with his belt and he had lifted his shirt, and it was pinned beneath his chin. Every inch of the exposed skin of his chest was covered in purple and blackish bruises. I didn’t mean to but I gasped and hugged the towel against my chest. Swiftly he lowered the shirt and an unnerving silence loomed.

  There had been many rumors that he and his father didn’t get along and some people even said that his father was violent. But I never imagined that it was to that extent.

  “It’s okay, Kai. I won’t tell anyone.”

  His jaw hardened and all traces of the boy who touched me a few minutes ago were gone. The fierce eyes glaring at me made me wince. There was so much anger inside of him. The bruises and blotches I saw were only the surfaces of his wounds. The real pain was within.

  “Tell what?” He hissed between gritted teeth. “This was a mistake. You were a fucking mistake. I don’t know where my head was at.”

  “But…”

  “Stay the hell away from me Shayleigh. Everyone’s right, you’re fat and ugly.” His eyes drifted to the towel in my hand and he yanked it out of my grip. “I never want to see you again.” Without another word, he stormed out.

  Tears prickled my eyes and my chest hurt. The hateful words echoed in my mind. It wasn’t the first time I was called fat or ugly but coming from Kai, the boy I loved since I could remember, devastated me.

  Fighting back the urge to cry, I was motionless with the shock and pain of what had happened. But then I snapped out of it and decided to follow him. I saw him turn a corner and I quickened my pace and was breathing hard when I reached the gym. The music had died do
wn and Kai was on the stage with a mic in hand.

  But that wasn’t all.

  He had the bloody towel tied around his neck like a cape.

  “Today I did the impossible.” He sneered into the mic. “I slayed the four-eyed elephant and here’s the proof.” He pivoted, showcasing the red spots on the towel. “Isn’t that right, Shayleigh?” He turned in my direction and our eyes locked. “I did you a favor. No one in their right mind would ever fuck you.”

  The principal made it to the stage and seized the mic from his hand but it was too late. The damage was done. Everyone was staring, pointing, and laughing at me.

  I spun on my heels and ran home.

  The worst part was that I had to stay in town until graduation and endured weeks of humiliation. Kai didn’t show up to school again. I didn’t care to know what happened to him and hoped to never see him again. When I was finally out of Rosavale, I promised to never return.

  One

  Kai

  Five years ago, I left and swore never to return, and yet here I was in downtown Rosavale. It was as if no time had passed at all. Even the flowers in the gardens were all the same.

  I was confused and angry. I didn’t want to be here and all I wanted was to forget. Forget Rosavale, my family, and everything I went through.

  Hanging my helmet on my bike, I spotted them. My brothers.

  Devan, Talon, and I figured the redhead next to them was Navia. She’d changed a lot. Devan was the same—only older—and Talon had grown into a man. No longer the little boy I left behind.

  Devan was assessing me and Navia was doubtful as if she couldn’t believe it was me. Talon was the first to react, his face mirroring shock and then immense happiness. It was like going back in time, seeing his wide smile. He came up to me and surprised me by hugging me.

  “Kai, it’s you. I can’t believe you came back.”

  Not knowing what to do with my hands, I patted him on the back. There was no denying that I missed him. “You grew up, kid.”